citizendetective | IC contact for lastvoyages

Oh my god, John, are you serious? I literally said the opposite of that! I didn't say I decided we were done, I said I figured you were done, it's right there in black and white--

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, MISTY, that is EXACTLY THE FUCKING POINT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO MAKE: I am ABSOLUTELY FUCKING SERIOUS RIGHT NOW. To ME, that sounds like YOU DECIDED we were done after the greenhouse, you DECIDED how I felt and gave up and didn't consider us friends after that. TO ME, IN **BLACK AND WHITE**, that is what it says.

Well, maybe that's because you always assume the worst of me! And also? Angry capslock went out in the late two-thousands!

A GOOD THING I'M FROM 1934 AND OLDER THAN TIME THEN!

[ There's a pause. ]

I don't fucking assume the worst of you. I assume you're acting like me, especially when I'm scared or hurt or feel helpless. So unless I'm the worst, that isn't true!

And I'll turn that right back around on you, Misty: Why *won't* you address the shitty thing you did? If I keep bringing it up, why not just deal with it and then we can get to the thing you want to talk about that we HAVE IN FACT TALKED ABOUT A MILLION FUCKING TIMES NOW but you STILL WON'T FUCKING BELIEVE ME because TO THIS DATE we've addressed that one fucking phrase four times but you have given me a TOTAL NON ANSWER to both assuming I would betray you when I didn't AND to the fact that you used what I said about Arthur to hurt me for NO FUCKING REASON.

So NO, I'm not getting off of it until you address it. We're not talking about a thing that DOES NOT MEAN WHAT YOU KEEP THINKING IT MEANS and I'm not discussing how you feel about it because how you feel about it is determined entirely by what YOU CHOOSE TO BELIEVE and it doesn't MATTER what I say, it HASN'T MATTERED WHAT I SAY ABOUT IT, so there's no FUCKING point.

Edited 2022-12-06 02:44 (UTC)

I told you, I don't want to talk about it on the network. I want to wait until you'll see me.

Edited 2022-12-06 02:45 (UTC)

You didn't specify. I thought you just meant for SHOOTING Arthur.

And I guess we can't discuss either then.

[There's a notable pause before she replies.]

Ever?

No, in person, remember?

And I'm asking if you're saying we can't discuss it just for now, or if we can't ever discuss it, because you're never going to be willing to see me in person again.

Oh.

No.

I meant

A couple of days, that's all.

You're not telling Natalie you won't see her in person.

No. There's reasons for that.

But the big one is that she needs me.

Just like I'm sure you've needed Pagan for this.

It's more complicated, but that's between us. I hope you understand.

[She absolutely does not. She wants those complications.]

Why is it between you?

Because she's my inmate and I'm her warden.

Just like there are things between you and Pagan I'd never ask you about.

She's from my world. We're teammates.

By that logic, I should

I said should

I didn't say 'did'

I didn't say 'intend to'

I said SHOULD

tell Arthur everything in Natalie's file.

But we both know it doesn't work like that.

[Without really seriously considering it as an option, Misty thinks about turning the audio back on, and turning on the waterworks. She wonders if guilting him would work here.

But she doesn't do that, which means that the message she actually sends is both more matter-of-fact, and more honest.]

You can just say it: it's because you like her more than me.

Will you believe me if I say that isn't it?

Because it isn't.

That isn't it.

No.

I'll consider the possibility that you're telling the truth, but if you are, that doesn't make much sense.

Why?

Because the only two reasons that *do* make any sense are you preferring her, or you being her warden, and you already said the second thing isn't the whole story.

Are there times where you have to work yourself up to something because you know it's going to be difficult?

Edited 2022-12-07 00:26 (UTC)

Sure, but why wouldn't you have to work yourself up to it with Natalie? You're basically living with her now. Obviously you don't have any issue being around her.

Because things are much simpler with Natalie.

Not better or worse, just more simple.

I also know that she did what she did because she cares about me. Even if she was wrong, even if I'm angry, her intention was to help me.

It's not the same with you.

You still think I try to mess with you, don't you.

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